Friday, September 16, 2011

Creeper in the Bathroom

So there's this guy who works in my office building (which only has three floors and houses only a few companies) who always uses our bathroom and I think it should be stopped.
My organization takes up two suites = the whole top floor. This guy works on the basement floor. Point being he has to walk up 4 flights of stairs to get to our bathroom. Oh, and those four flights are in a structure that is topped with glass that acts much like a greenhouse, creating intense and often uncomfortable temperatures the higher you climb. For further illustration, he has a bathroom (technically two) on his floor and the same options on the floor in between us. For purposes of gender identity inclusion, we don't have a "men's room" and a "ladies room" but rather two restrooms that anyone could use. One of them, "the suite", is a one person stall and you can lock the door and have the space all to yourself. Which one do you think he comes up and invades? You guessed it. He hikes up four flights of stairs in the grueling heat past two other sets of bathrooms to muck up the one place no one will knock on the door and disrupt you.
A firm believer in citizen justice leagues (and if you know how I can start one of these, please let me know), I feel it's my duty to confront/shame/stop him from this intolerable practice. It's gotten to the point that if the door to the bathroom suite is shut and I don't know all my coworkers whereabouts, I sometimes hide behind the office door, peeping through a tiny window awaiting a glimpse of the bathroom hog. Usually it ends up being a legitimate coworker who somehow fell off my radar. And this guy is good.....he seems to only physically appear when I have a client with me or am otherwise truly busy with the important work that goes on here to be able to stage my planned bathroom intervention. But I hear rumors of him being around much more often than I see him and just the thought of him in our sacred spaces creeps me out.
Most fascinating to me is his motive. What is going on with this guy that he has to go so far away from his coworkers for his bathroom break? It can't be that he is embarrassed because he shows absolutely no pride in busting onto a floor that is soley occupied by one company and, I might add, IS FILLED SOLELY WITH FEMALE EMPLOYEES. We didn't  need a men's room so we got rid of it and he keeps coming up here and imposing his will!
What's up with this guy? I am now accepting hypotheses.


  1. I wonder whether it's possible to put a door bell outside the glass doors from the stairway and therefore only staff can go up to the third floor and let people in? I doubt it's possible, but just a thought. What a weirdo! Unfrotunately, due to the nature of your work, signs can't be displayed...then again, he's probably using his "male privilege" to go and invade anywhere he wants! ~ JoAnn

  2. How long is he taking in there? That's a clue.

  3. That's weird! Maybe he's going in there to play Angry Birds or something on his cell phone.