Happiness Is....

What do I write about most often? Things that relieve my stress, which tends to mostly be created at work. We call stress relievers "self-care" and, as cheesy as it sounds, it's actually an important thing to think about every single day, no matter what you call it. If you don't refill your proverbial tank, there is no way to be happy in the long term. And isn't that what we are all seeking, ultimately? Happiness.

So for me, a few things that relieve stress and I tend to write about a lot are reading, traveling, reality tv, and spending time with friends.For the 4th of July holiday, I took an extra couple of days off from work and was able to cover most of these bases. Here's a little recap:

Reading: I read "Before I Fall" by Lauren Oliver this week. She also writes the Delirium trilogy. All are young adult books but I think that's what makes them as yummy and addictive as gummy bears. Characters in high school are so relateable because we have all been through similar ups and downs and at the heart, they are all about identity and I think identity is something we spend a lifetime honing. I have been on such a dystopian kick that I actually had this book for months before finally giving it my attention. I think I read one too many dystopians and just needed a break and I could not be more pleased with this book. If you have ever visited the site www.foreveryoungadult.com (which you should), you might be familiar with the term "TEABS" The End of an Awesome Book Syndrome. I totally had that last night as I cried at least three times while reading the last chapter and felt a little hollow when it was done so I had to keep the book near me, almost to visually trick myself that I still had more to read and wasn't totally disconnected from the characters.

Traveling: I didn't get to officially travel this weekend. However, the pictures from my trip to Atlantic City two weekends ago were finally released by the team photographer and I got to live some moments over again as I scrolled through them, which was pretty awesome. It was a girl posse trip, for a friends bachelorette party and you know I think girl posses are the best way to travel!

Reality TV: It was really beautiful outside and there were lots of fun things going on to celebrate Independence Day so I didn't do a lot of tv watching. I do think I caught up on HGTV's Design Star and decided that I just can't stay committed to Pregnant in Heels even though it's a really cute show.

Time with Friends: This is really where I excelled this week. 
On Wednesday, to celebrate the holiday, I went to a friend's house. The group is one filled with people I have known since high school and it's really cool to see people as the evolve through life. Seeing people who you used to party with parent their children is just precious. They also live on the water and when it got dark the whole neighborhood gathered, along with people on boats, to watch as a few local houses set off town display grade fireworks and people passed out glow sticks and sparklers. 
On Thursday my bestie came to my parents pool for some down home relaxing and sun worshiping. I headed out in the late afternoon to get a long awaited massage. AHHHHH.
Friday I drove to Salem, MA, home of the witches:) My life long partner in crime/maid of honor was in town from St. Louis so it was great to spend some time with her and her family. I so appreciate that I love her family just as much as I love her and it felt great to be with such warm people.
Saturday was the best as I went to my cousin's raucous cookout. It's my favorite party of the year! There are so many eclectic people and the family gets to sit down and share stories. Days like that just can't be replaced. Then I went out with another set of friends to watch the UFC Pay Per View. It was a late night but a great fight night. I'm kind of manly in my passion for MMA fighting:)
And then Sunday....a day to regroup. To reflect.

It's amazing to me how just a few days off from work can make such a huge, rejuvenating difference. And it matters less where you are than who you are surrounded by. And that it's so easy to get happy.

Karma is Real

I don't believe in Deja Vu or any of that other funny business. And, generally, I believe the concept of karma to be true but have not believed in it's actuality. Until this morning's commute.
Each morning I am in my car for a minimum of 45 minutes. That's a lot of time to find new songs I like, think about the chores I need to find someone to do and get mad at other drivers. This morning I had one really nice thought. Like so nice I had to touch my heart and get misty. But then I had a lot of not so nice thoughts. And at least one that was so naughty I had to talk it out of my head.

Shortly after the really not so nice thought I got caught behind a student driver. How's that for karma? And it was seriously like the student drivers lack of skill was commensurate with the degree of my bad thought. This was the worst student driver I have ever been within a 4 mile radius of. At one point we rounded a bend that had one of those speed marker things and it clocked the student driver (and, thus, me stuck behind him/her) at 11 mph. I'm pretty sure I could push my car faster than that. My leg was cramping from hovering over the break because cars do not want to go 11 mph.

After being stuck behind the student driver from Hell for the longest 3 miles of my life, I was lucky enough to be able to take a right hand turn and escape. I really wanted to look into the car and identify what kind of person could drive that bad but I knew I couldn't look at them without saying mean things so I just said the mean things while I looked straight ahead instead. One of my favorite things to do whenever I am stuck behind an especially frustrating driver and I have the chance to pass them on my way to turn or something is to slow down and glare in at them to sufficiently communicate my wrath for them, by the way.

So I take the turn and start on my alternate route when I come across some fat town workers repainting the cross walks. I am all for that since I once got pulled over for failing to stop for a little girl in a cross walk and my defense, in all honesty, was that I didn't see that there was even a cross walk there because it was so faint. And I don't stop for jaywalkers. That's like encouraging delinquency. The fat painters were taking up a whole lane of traffic and forced me to drive like I was in London for a minute, which unnerved me when my body had just started to regulated itself in the aftermath of the anger that surged through it as a result of the student driver. Just another couple blocks after that obstacle I found some road construction blocking my path. Really??Being the resourceful girl that I am, I took another turn that would help me get around the construction without being spit out onto the main road where people like to open their car doors just to dare you to hit them. Feeling pretty proud of myself and just around the corner from work, I had to stop at a stop sign in order to take a left. Now no one likes to take left turns, right? Looking in two directions is exhausting. So I was understanding when the car in front of me took a minute to make the turn. But then another minute went by and I was starting to feel less understanding so I decided to assess the situation. What would karma do if you successfully got away from the worst student driver ever? Karma would put a funeral procession in your path next. Yup. All those purple flags on the car with sad people mourning a loss inside and I can usually muster up some empathy, if not jealousy for the fact that they get a day off when I am on my way to work. But this morning all I could think was that they were in my way and it was some cosmic retribution.

So the moral of the story is that when you are cranky you shouldn't drive. And if you don't drive then you can't go to work. And if all the cranky people in the world didn't go to work, think of how nice all the people who waited on you at restaurants and stores all day would be!!

Nothing tastes as good as thin feels....except a Blizzard

It amuses me that I can go three weeks feeling so overwhelmed that I consider never writing a blog post again and then one day I wake up and think of all the things I want to blog about. Therefore, I am now officially considering blogging a sign of health. If I feel good enough to want to blog, my stress level must be manageable.

Last week my stress level was not manageable. I was in one of those places where you are either very hostile or crying. One of the themes this blog revolves around is self-care. It's a very social workery term but it's got a great meaning that everyone should adopt. Self care is what it sounds like: taking care of yourself. But it's really more about the awareness of the ways you are already doing it or making a conscious effort to do more. Or, really, acknowledging that you need to take care of yourself because things are hard and taking care of yourself helps.

For example, yesterday I had a crappy afternoon of working with a struggling mom and facing stupid restrictions from big systems that are supposed to help such as the welfare/homelessness system. As I was driving away from a maddening meeting, I turned on the radio to help distract me. The first verbal commentary from the dj was about how it's  hard to believe Rihanna playing a "tough girl" in the movie Battleship after "you know who did you know what". If I began to tell you how infuriating I found this, it would be a very long, very unfunny post about social injustice so I will spare you but I really hope anyone reading this recognizes how un-okay that is! Someone isn't weak because they were victimized.

Needless to say, I needed to do some self-care STAT. Lucky for me, I just happen to drive by a Dairy Queen on my way between jobs. A good friend often jokes about "eating her feelings" and that's so what I did. And you know those people who say "nothing tastes as good as thin feels"? They lied. You know how you look back at pictures and think "wow, I looked good" but you remember that, at the time, you didn't think you looked good? When you are thin, you often don't feel thin enough. That doesn't feel good! But a Blizzard....it really did feel good. By the last spoonful I was even dreaming up new Ryan Gosling Tumblrs!! That's a drastic turn around and you can't even deny it.  

I went missing again

I went missing again. Sorry. This time it was because I ran off to Costa Rica. But more on that later....
This was officially my last trip of 2011. It has been a great travel year. At first, traveling a lot this year was about doing the things I couldn't do once I started a family. A last hurrah, if you will. But it ended up planting a seed of learning about different ways to balance life. How to reduce stress but not run away. How to relax and be active at the same time. How to appreciate other cultures while recognizing my own. And, most of all, how to be grateful for the life I have created for myself at home. 

 

TGIF

Do you ever have days when you are just vacant? I'm sure you do. We all do. I'm having one of those hard-to-focus, want-to-to-nothing kinds of days. Actually, I wouldn't mind napping. Or watching a movie. Or even reading. But as far as accomplishing things, today would not be my day.

Maybe it's because it's not even Halloween and it snowed last night and they are predicting a Nor'easter for tomorrow night when I should be dressing up and going to a party. It's generally shocking when it snows a dusting before Thanksgiving but this....this is just ridiculous weather. It's extra silly that just two weekends ago we broke records for being in the 80's. I didn't realize until I started blogging just how much I talk about the weather but there's no denying that what you see outside your window impacts your state of mind.

Or maybe it's because we had a big work event last night and I didn't get home until like 11:30. I usually go to bed between 12:30-1:00 so it's not that being up that late was a problem. But part of the reason I go to bed so late is because when I get home, which is still typically later like 9ish, I need a little time to just unwind. For me that most often means I need to watch some tv and zone out a bit. So when you get home at 11:30 and still need time to zone, it gets late fast.

I'm also working a little part time job on the side now. It would be embarrassing if it wasn't so much fun. Even though it's only 1-2 nights a week, it makes my weeks feel even more full. Now every night of the week has an assignment. One night for the gym, one for the pt job, one for date night, one working at my ft job and the weekends are more variable. It's increasingly challenging to find the balance between work time, time with hubby, time with friends and family and time just for me. Add the basics like cleaning, grocery shopping and laundry to the mix. Now sprinkle in some much needed exercise and trying to attend church services. And, of course, keeping up with all the reality tv shows I need to stay grounded. And occasionally reading. Or writing this blog.

Now with all of this, when life throws a legit curve ball and offers up something into the universe that genuinely warrants my stress levels increasing, it's kind of like walking through a white carpeted room with a glass of tropical punch Kool Aid at a fast clip.

So, I guess a vacant day is warranted. And I assume you will understand why the blog doesn't always get the love it deserves. Or why sometimes I stray from my topics of focus. Or why this post has almost no complete sentences. I am not thinking in complete sentences today. Cheers to the weekend!

Hotels.com shall hear my wrath

I feel a little bad being so negative but, as a consumer, I care about other people's experiences with services and, therefore, feel like I have to share my experience with Hotels.com.
In the Spring of 2009, I used their services to book a single night in the DC area. We went to visit some friends who were house sitting for family there and stayed with them for a few days. The final night, we needed a hotel so we could be closer to the airport and catch our flight. Long story short, when we got to the hotel, they didn't have our reservation. After a long day of train rides and frustration to get there, the last thing I was in the mood for was 2 hours in a hotel lobby. I had to spend a long time on the phone with multiple customer service reps to get things cleared up. They offered me a measly peace offering but it was just not enough to balance the trouble they had caused. I was able to talk them up to something that felt like a better reimbursement.
They sent me out a voucher for "hotel bucks" for a future stay. I didn't realize it had an expiration date but, luckily, I found it before it expired. I called customer service and asked if they could extend it or apply it toward a hotel I was booking the following month. At that time, I received some excellent customer service by a woman named Fatima. If she is out there or if anyone else linked with Hotels.com reads this and somehow in the very large company knows this employee, I want her/them to know that she is exceptional, in the true sense of the word; she is an exception to the rest of the experience I have had with the company. She made the phone call and the process easy and a pleasant experience.
The new voucher was set to arrive within 4-5 weeks. Fast forward 3 months and my patience has run out. So I called to see what the hold up was all about. The first woman I spoke to was at least capable. She understood my dilemma and was communicating with the appropriate department on my behalf. She put me on hold and I waited. And waited. And then, after 15 minutes or so invested in this process, the phone disconnected me! They had my number, as I had just reiterated it to them, so they could have called me back but they didn't. I called them back and got a new customer service rep. Thank goodness I don't know her name or I would publicly rally for her to never be employed working with people again. She could not grasp what I was explaining AT ALL. She kept referring to my reservation number, even though I kept telling her it wasn't about a reservation and that I had a "case id number" instead. She referenced my most recent hotel booking with them even though I made it clear this had zero to do with that. Finally, at my wit's end, I asked if I could just speak with a manager so I could get this resolved once and for all. She was not very pleased about that but grudgingly put me on hold. For 23 minutes of silence. Literally 23 minutes. Who knows how much longer it might have gone on because after 23 minutes, I had another commitment I had to attend to. The whole process took nearly an hour and I still have no resolution. Actually, I have to call again today!
It's extremely unjust and poor service if the olive branch they extended I fought for to make up for mistake #1 turns into mistake #2 and when I call to remedy that, results in mistakes #3 and #4! No one should have to spend this kind of time fixing someone else's problem (and I fix problems for a living!).
Oh, and in the midst of all this it became clear that the hotel bucks, should they ever be figured out, actually won't cover the hotel stay I booked through them explicitly to use them up. There's some distinction about prepaid rooms. Point being, I am going to have to use them again to redeem the reimbursement they owe me.
This is ludicrous in my book. I have had positive experiences with Travelocity and will keep my business there and, while I don't recommend any particular travel assistance site for you, I do caution you that if you have a problem with Hotels.com, it will be a headache to get it resolved. Good luck and good day.

Home Sweet Home with a Case of the Mondays

So many of my posts over the last six months have somehow related to travel. Neighbors and people at church have begun frequently commenting on my adventures and I'm happy and proud to have another activity with which to identify.
For the past few years, doing triathlons has been a big part of my identity and a source of pride. It's funny how quickly things can flip upside down as this year, without the aid of a team to train with, I feel woefully unprepared for the one sprint race I registered for. It's this Saturday and I have had a stomach ache all day in anticipation. 4 more days of this feeling??! Somehow, I need to convince myself to not worry about the numbers and just enjoy the event. We use to placate ourselves with thoughts of it being more than most people do but it's still hard not to make comparisons, if only with your former self.
Identifying with travel as my hobby of choice slightly softens the blow of not being proud of myself for triathlons this season. At least I have something else exciting to fill the void, right?
That was all a tangent, though. My main focus when I started writing this blog hours ago before I got sidetracked about 419 times was to write about the mixed blessing of coming home again. After another week away, I really wanted to be at home.
Last week I was lucky enough to be invited to spend 4 days at a friend's beach house on the Maine coast followed by 3 days at a different friend's Cape Cod house. Both were relaxing, filled with good company and conversation, and wonderful venues to follow my own volition; to choose how I wanted to fill my time instead of sticking to frantic schedule that is my normal routine. With one night at home in between, I found it hard to leave again. I wanted to spend time with Hubby, to pet the cats, to clean the house!
When I finally arrived home last night, it was welcomed as I enjoyed my familiar surroundings, my own comfortable couch and bed, the TV shows I had recorded, the husband and the cats. However, it also brought a to-do list both at home and, today, at work as long as the neck of a giraffe. After a week of ignoring responsibilities, it feels like they have reproduced Gremlin-style, seemingly exponential in growth.
This post isn't profound or even amusing but it was really cathartic for me. I just needed to "say" that I'm glad to be home and glad to have a break before my next extended stay away from home but also that this kind of stress that I'm returning to is exactly what makes me want to drop it all again and lay in the sun without a deep thought in my head.

Beach Life

I just felt like I needed to check in quickly. I'm at the beach this week and beach life is wondeful! I have lost all concept of time and obligation. I'm having travel epiphanies just from driving up the coast and planting myself within sight of the ocean. Aren't the clouds just AMAZING?!

Follow up on the Stress Less Initiative

I wanted to update you on the state of my Stress Less Initiative. Returned from my first trip to mainland Europe and deeply impacted by the cultural emphasis on enjoying life instead of rushing through it, as the focus seems to be in the States, I made a vow of sorts. Instead of "Vacation Maureen" making an appearance slightly before, during, and as long as possible after my trip, I would strive to incorporate some of her better attributes into my "real life".
While there are days that are setbacks, overall, I think I have been pretty successful in making a shift. Similar to the philosophy that it takes 21 days of a behavior to make it a habit, I have been hanging on to a more laid back take on life for over two months now!
Here's what's helping and working:
1. It's still summer. I love the sun, the pool, the beach and all other things summery. Even though I haven't had a full summer vacation since I was in high school, there is something magical about the months that schools are not in session. Traffic on my commute is lighter. My actual work load tends to be lighter. Summer week days and weekend days seem to have blurrier lines than other times of year.
2. I have been immersing myself in travel daydreams. One of my best friends, with whom I most recently traveled, is also obsessed with exploring new destinations and is committed to planning future trips. In addition to having two trips planned for September and one in November, I have a week off this month for some beach time. When I am not actually going somewhere or planning to go somewhere, I read about other people going somewhere and get excited.
3. There are lots of fun things on the social calendar to look forward to. Leaving home isn't the only way to have fun! The Boston area hosts restaurant week in August and I have some great dinner plans on the agenda. It's also triathlon season and my race date is speeding toward me far faster than I will be speeding across the finish line. There are pool parties to attend and weekend adventures to embark on. Life doesn't feel stagnant at all.
4. I'm listening to myself more. You know that part in Eat, Pray, Love in Italy when they are talking about the pleasure of doing nothing? Americans don't even have a word for it! I have been trying to pay attention both to the little things that bring me pleasure and doing them more often and also paying attention to when my mind and body need to slow down. I have broken plans because I needed a day of nothingness. I have resisted booking up all my free time so that I can decide what I really am in the mood for when the free time comes. I snuck in some sleeping late, a nap, and good reads. Sometimes I eat toast with nutella on it for dinner because I would rather eat that than chicken. This is just a small way I can bring the cultural component from Europe that I so appreciated home to my daily life.
What is not working?
1. I'm not getting enough workouts.  In summers past, I have trained for my triathlons with a group, which was a huge motivation for me. This year, there were not enough people to form a training team. About once a week I get together with some tri friends from the past and we do a group bike ride and I love it. I also have a class at the gym once a week that I am very dedicated to; the teacher is wonderful and it's a great workout. Beyond that, though, in following what I really want to do, it's often more about laying by the pool with a book than it is about going for a run. I'm getting so good at indulging myself, in fact, that when I went for a run over the weekend, after 2.75 miles of dripping sweat I decided I really didn't like running and, even though I was still 2 miles from home, I chose to walk instead!
2. I play on the weeknights and am tired for work. In pursuit of the things that bring me pleasure, I have met up with friends frequently on week nights. We have had some amazing times!!! Until the alarm goes off the next morning and I have to go to work.....Yawn!
3. I can't seem to let go of the stress that housework creates. I'm learning to take work in stride much more but house work? Not so much. I could go on and on about this one but, for your sanity and my own, I will leave it at that.
So, overall, I feel like Vacation Maureen is a much larger presence in everyday life. Do I need a new name? If she is here so often, does Vacation Maureen even make sense anymore?
And yet, I am still fearful that as school starts again work will get busy and as fall descends and the days get shorter, life will feel less like a vacation and it's still possible that I may lose my grasp on the Stress Less Initiative.

And the Winner Is........

I have been entering contests like squirrel hoarding nuts for a long winter lately. Maybe I should start playing the lottery, too, because I really have myself deluded into thinking that I stand even a slight chance in all of these sweepstakes. Want to name a cruise ship? YES! Want to win a trip to St. Croix? OF COURSE! How about a gift certificate to a local restaurant you have only been to once? SURE!

Actually, last night I even had a dream last night about scoring special privileges at a concert that started out as Counting Crows and morphed into New Kids on the Block. By the way, if they ever decided to go on tour together, the likelihood of me quitting my job to run away and become a groupie would be a bet you could be sure to make some money off, in case my name ever comes up in Vegas.

So does this all mean I am one step closer to an official crazy cat lady label? Am on the cusp of checking my mail every day to see if Ed McMahon sent me a check? (1. I've never actually spelled his name before! 2. Is he still alive and giving out checks, even? another dream dashed.....). Or is my stress-less initiative working so well that it has launched me into the realm of fantasy?

One Airline You Should Never Fly

In the midst of my travel blog reading frenzy, I stumbled upon a post that brought me more joy and validation than any other blog post ever created. The travelling editor wrote a great, ranting post about Ryan Air. To say that my traveling companions and I had a bad experience with this airline while traveling from Seville to Magaluf and onto Madrid is a huuuuuuge understatement.

It is strongly recommended that you read the above post and my comments about Ryan Air, below, before you take the bait of alleged cheap fares. It will save you so much drama and frustration on your otherwise lovely travels. What a lesson on reading the fine print!

To get really specific, let me just give one clear example: One girl I was with had to pay 350 Euro to get her luggage on the plane and an additional 40 Euro to check her carry on bag, which fit the regulations for every other airline. Oh, and once you print your boarding pass, you can't make any changes to your flight so, in an effort to save the money they charge you to print your boarding pass at the airport, we had printed our tickets before the trip. You know what that detail cost me?? A side trip to Morocco!!

I seriously wish I had seen this post prior to my friend booking our Ryan Air tickets to travel within Spain. It was, by far, the worst experience with an airline I have ever had. They epitomize the corporate devil. Pay to print boarding passes?? Crazypants! We spent time we could have been enjoying beautiful cities in search of Internet cafes to avoid giving Ryan Air one more cent. The weight limits, though, are the most absurd of their protocol. I honestly don't think I can even write about it without sweating. And, yes, the crazy carry on baggage sizes…although I have to admit I found this one amusing for all the trouble it caused a travel companion who was irritating me. Once you finally get on the plane, you can't even get water without pulling out your wallet. And who sells you scratch tickets when you are above the clouds? Cheesy. I HATE RYAN AIR! I am so glad to find a community to support my anger.

Self Care: More than a Concept

Right after I wrote up and published my post about my blogger identity crisis, I had a bit of what Oprah would call an Aha! moment. It's like airing my personal frustration and putting it all out in the Universe cleared my mind again.
The things I write about actually have a common thread of which I wasn't totally aware. They are all about "Self Care". Unsure of if this term is actually used in the real world or if we just made it up in the human service field, let me clarify that this self explanatory phrase is just a shortcut to capture any activities that help you replenish yourself. For me, these things include physical activity, spirituality, mind numbing pop culture, reading, humor, fixing up the house and, of course, travel! Those are the things I tend to blog about, too. They are the things that bring me pleasure, relaxation, escape.
At work, people sometimes tease me about being the self care queen. Part of the ritual I have worked into the closing of our support groups is to have everyone "check out" at the end of group with one thing they will do that week to take care of themselves, treat themselves. Sometimes it's as simple as getting a fountain soda! (I actually had a woman call me last week to let me know she had bought her very own soda, not to be shared with her kids.) One survivor of domestic violence that I have worked with for years, when asked what the organization has done for her so eloquently reported " taught me about self care as a concept and that I was deserving of it".
How amazing is that? What a gift! That, to me, totally speaks to the "give a man a fish/teach him to fish" proverb.
Maybe that's what my posts bring to the blogging world: A reminder to do the things that make you happy. To indulge a little bit each day. To take at least a brief break from nurturing everyone around you to nurture yourself.

Happy 4th of July!

First off, I love a 3 day weekend!! And a 3 day weekend with amazing weather? Pretty much the greatest thing ever.
There's really no need to travel in the summer. New England is at it's loveliest from June-November. It's the other 6 months we should all hit the road. For now, though, I am blissed out from multiple days of amazingness.
Thursday night I went to a wedding at the Crane Estate in Ipswich. The Crane Estate had amazing ocean views and was truly stunning, despite far too many buggies in residence.
Saturday I went to my cousin's annual Fourth of July barbecue. (I ended up bringing Oreo truffles at the host's request). It's great to spend time with family who are fun!
Sunday was wedding celebration part II in Cambridge. We ate our fill of Haitian food and Hubby wrapped two plates to go just like my grandmother would:)
Today was just amazing. Clear skies, sunshine, temps in the high 80s, pool water in the low 80s. I had a solo pool party and was extremely content. I don't think I am ever more relaxed than when I am in the sun by the pool, reading. I was a little like Dr. Seuss; I read in a chair, I read in the pool, I read in the sun, I read where it's cool. I sat outside for about 6 hours before I decided Hubby might send out a search party.
For the first time in a while, I didn't think about my next trip abroad but was thinking about all the days ahead on the beaches of Cape Cod and Maine and New Hampshire I could squeeze in. I think my wanderlust might settle down while the sun sticks around home.......

Vacation Discrimination

I'm officially coining the term "vacation discrimination". I have experienced it and it is real. It is when people judge you or hate on you for having cooler vacations than they have. Here's an example from yesterday:
Work announced some major cuts to our benefits that will hurt my already weakly padded wallet. I mentioned this to someone and got the response "you have had more international trips in the last year than anyone I know so I don't feel bad for you". Really??
Travel is a lifestyle choice. Some people spend a lot of money on fancy cars or clothes or designer purses. Some people go out for decadent meals. Others drink their money away at the local pub. A lot of people my age have children who cost a lot to clothe and feed. I don't have or do any of those things. I prioritize seeing new places and making memories that way. Why is it acceptable not only to judge that choice but to verbalize it to me?? Do I say, "Hey, nice khakis! Bet those cost you a pretty penny. Just for that, if you have to join the working poor, you won't get my sympathy!"? No, because the way we spend our money reflects our values and the ways we rejuvenate ourselves. Who says my values have to match yours?

Just a minor setback...

Just a minor setback in the stress-less initiative, that is. Although I wrote about stressing less yesterday, it has actually been an unnamed resolution in my life for a few weeks. Therefore, it's actually less bad to have a set back today than it seems. It's not like I just came up with the plan to be less stressed yesterday and here I go, the next day, failing. I guess from the tone of this intro, though, that you can sense that failure. I'm kind of manic.

My pants are too tight today so I'm feeling a little less sassy. My hair is too flat. It's a stunning day outside and I'm locked at my desk, watching people in bathing suits at the water park through my window. Surely, it's just minutes until the ice cream man shows up to rub salt in my wound. Clients at work decided to burst forth with creative problems yesterday, spilling into today. I have to work a 12 hour day. I feel pretty guilty about eating Chinese food three days this week. Peking ravioli are kind of my new obsession.

Here's the good news: Last night I went to a comedy show and laughed until I cried. I particularly recommend a young comedian from Providence, Rhode Island named Daniel Martin. This weekend I am going to the Cape, aka Cape Cod, for a girl's weekend/mini bachelorette party for one of my best friends. That is something fabulous to look forward to. So, hopefully today's setback is just for the day. As my favorite leading lady, Scarlett O'Hara would say, "After all, tomorrow IS another day".

Stress-Less Initiative

I have to admit that part of holding on to my vacation glow is about not really committing back to my "real" life. Monday night was the first time there were no dirty dishes in the sink. I only partially cleaned the house over the weekend and there are still some areas that deserve attention. I have yet to find my work cell phone and I even forgot the keys to my desk on Monday, rendering me fairly useless much of the day.
This is all part of my new stress-less initiative. Why does the American culture make long work hours, high stress, and dissatisfaction with __________ (fill in the blank with anything from your body to your marriage) the norm? The expectation?
I'm becoming a rebel. I'm fighting "the man" on this one.
I am thinking of this vacation glow now as more of a lifestyle change. You know how when people go on a diet, they fail and fall back into old eating patterns? What works is when people learn about nutrition and find exercise they enjoy for something more than losing weight. That's how I feel about my stress-less policy. If I think of it as a temporary shift post vacation, it sets me up to lose it at some point and fall back into the rut of being stressed out too much of the time. However, if it's a lifestyle shift, it becomes a new way of life.
This is just day one of this rant, be forewarned:) And I found a very viable option for my next trip online today.....